Three Months

I have a hard time believing it's been over three months. There is a surreal quality to these last three months. I think much of what happened from Jan. 12 - Jan 22 is just now starting to be processed by my heart and head. And it still stuns me at times. The magnitude of what happened in Haiti. The swiftness of the kids coming here. How much has truly changed for forever. How tired we are. How expensive four kids is going to be. It has changed everything. EVERYTHING. And if I feel this way, how must Re and Er being feeling it.
Pray for us...while we know others struggle through this same process, at times it feels like we are very alone. We feel under attack on a daily basis. While there is much joy, there is alot of stress and pressure. We aren't doing enough. We can't. That is a hard. To not meet everyone's needs everytime. To not be able to write checks to pay everything that needs paid. There is no balance. We aren't sure it's possible. We are trusting that God will provide and his GRACE is sufficent. That where we fail and are weak, his love and grace shows up. But it is hard to surrender to that. We would like to believe that in a year we will look back, and see how far we have come. But in reality, it might just be the same. Deciding which bill to pay and which one to not. The pressure and stress to do it may still feel overwhelming most days. However, the hope is that even if that is true, God's Grace is enough. For me. For R. For our marriage. For each of our kids.