Family Drama...

Laundry Soap -Update

Laundry Soap ALA Anita...
I love this stuff. It's a little cumbersome, but I think it's worth the effort. I have a 5 gallon bucket of a gel like substance. It's somethink akin to The Blob... and smells really good. I kept an old laundry soap container. I filled it halfway up with The Blob, added water and shook. It sounds easy- but required a funnel, a stick and patience. I made quite a mess on the laundry room floor. However, since I never mop it - I figured it was due to be cleaned. Next time I'll put a towel down.

So I think it's doing a great job at cleaning the clothes. Better than the other laundry soaps I've tried.

I've always been frustrated by how quickly clothes mildew in the washer. Try as I might, sometimes my laundry sits in my washer a few hours, or even overnight. I get distracted and forget. It happens alot actually. In a few hours they would smell - and I'd rewash. Then I learned to spray Frebreeze in the dryer with them and that usually helped. But only if it had only been a few hours. Overnight meant they HAD to be rewashed. With this soap, no mildew. Maybe I should experiment and see how long it would take. But we've gone up to 48 hours at this point, and they were fine. Seriously AWESOME!! That alone makes it worth it.

So, the homemade laundry soap is here to stay. I'm thinking it could be fun to experiment with. Maybe I'll give it out as Christmas presents. I really like this stuff! Do you think others would be offended to get laundry soap? Would you be? Does it say "You have dirty clothes, you stink, you need help?" I wouldn't want it to say that...yeah - I guess it does.

Thanksgiving Feast...

We are hopefully going to enjoy a Thanksgiving feast a day early. Myself, and the six children running around. Wait - make that seven children running around. The turkey is in the roaster. We've cut up celery -everyone cutting a stalk. We've got stuffing ready for the oven. Now we are on break until it's time to do the potato's. Then the turkey should be done, and we can set a beautiful table.

So the girls are all playing in their bedroom - Barbies. C and P have already done war this morning. So the sounds of them playing together sweetly- well, it's sweet. Much sweeter than slamming doors and names being called.

Back to Thanksgiving Feast. I'm not sure what made me think I should cook a Thanksgiving meal with 6+ children. Other than I remember the joy of bringing the meal together with my Mom and Nana. We travel to R's family for Thanksgiving and Christmas. We rarely cook an entire meal in our home. I want the girls to know how to make a holiday meal. I want them to know how much work goes into a holiday meal. I want them to remember cooking with Mom. Not just showing up and an amazing meal is magically on the table. I want them to remember the holidays as time spent together, in the kitchen cooking and visiting. Talking about where the receipe comes from, the best way to make sweet potato's (it doesn't involve anything that comes out of a can or marshmellows), and how fortunate we are to have so much.

So we are off to peel potato's, bake the stuffing, get the green beans started. The turkey smells amazing. And apple pie is waiting on the counter for dessert. YUM!!!

Waiting...I can't put my arms down

We received our Nov. update last Friday. R and Er look happy, and you can see the bond between them. We are so thankful to be able to keep them together. I can't imagine separating C & P. Or being separated from my brother and sister. Although growing up there were times when we would have done anything to be separated from each other, even if it meant a new family. Our family of 5 shared one bathroom, and I remember more than one fight over the use of hairbrushes. Yet, now - I do whatever it takes to have a meaningful relationship with each of them.

Anyway- back to waiting. So we knew we'd have to wait. We waited almost 10 years to start the process. We waited through the dossier process. But none of that compares to waiting once you have children that belong to you, and yet live a country away.

This is what the waiting feels like. Layers of clothing... yep -layers of clothing. The decision to start, the wait felt like a tank top on a summer day. Comfortable, appropriate, needed. Sending the dossier- putting on a t-shirt over the tank top. Still comfortable. Felt right to wait. Getting the referral -putting on another t-shirt. Only a little uncomfortable. Sometimes pulls the wrong way. But okay overall. Each monthly update adds another layer. Another t-shirt. Each layer makes it a little more uncomfortable. You adjust to the added layer, and move on with your life. But here is the fear- what happens if they aren't home in 18 months? Will I be like the kid in A Christmas Story? All bundled up for the cold, and unable to move. Unable to make a snowball? Will the wait suffocate me?

Yet, I know there is more. Jesus promised to take the burden of those who are weary. He promises rest. It's exhausting to try and live with layers of clothes adding weight and making it cumbersome to move. But it's really my choice... do I put on the layers? Do I give them to him and live the wait full of joy and anticipation? It's not easy - sometimes it's moment by moment. The moment where it's hard to breathe, when your mind wonders down the path of "how long could this take?", the moment where you wonder if pictures will be all you have, it's that moment that a choice is made. Do I put this on, wrap myself up in it? Or do I lay it down and ask Jesus to carry it?

I'm new to the wait - we've only just began. However, I can feel the burden building up. I can enjoy the pictures, and yet feel a loss that is unexplainable.

We are waiting on the mother's death certificate to be received so we are able to enter into IBESR. It seems that this should have been received by now. Of course, she should have lived and they should have never had to surrendered. In a perfect world, the death certificate wouldn't exist. So waiting on something that never should have been. Adoption is a mixed bag of feelings, and I don't think it ever really makes sense. Must be a God thing.

Well- kinda random post. Still have a bunch of kids running around, and making pies and cake balls for the upcoming holiday. So my mind is even more random than normal. But this has been rattling around in my brain and needed to be purged somewhere. So here it is.

No school... no peace

New keyboard is here! And it's so quiet... and clean. It's amazing how gross and dirty a keyboard gets. And no way to clean it, other than to blow the stuff out. And that is gross...I'd rather not know.

Anyways, that has nothing to do with today. Other than I can blog once again. Yeah!

So today - no school. And let me see how many kids are running around here. 1,2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, and 9. Yep-9 kids. Made pancakes, a triple bunch for 9 kids. Then cleaned up, 9 kids worth of mess. Drank a cup of coffee, big cup-9 kids worth. Then we did fun noodles. You wet them and they stick together. 9 kids went through a $5 bag in less than 7 minutes. Yeah...so that activity didn't take up nearly enough of the day.

Then I made lemon cake (for cake balls) and then I portioned out shortening to freeze for pie crust. Then cleaned up the mess from fun noodles (all 7 minutes of it). P and I then made a chocolate cake, more cake balls. While I usually advocate for real cake, 9 kids = cake mixes.

Then another big cup of coffee. And a 10 minutes break while everyone is playing nicely. Because that won't last with 9 kids. It's a matter of time before I'm referring.

So, the rest of the day looks like this. Finish pie crust and freeze. Make cranberry sauce. Make 9 kids worth of lunch. Put youngest to bed, put movie on for the rest. Clean up trashed kitchen, try to think it will make a difference. Pick up My Little Ponies from hallway. Cuddle with my girls. Make dinner x2, and deliver to family who is hurting. Oh yeah- I should go and call them. Note to self, call after blogging. Back to the rest of the day. Forget that I have laundry to fold, ignore dirty living room floor, and attempt to keep a bathroom clean with 2 boys using it all day.

However, I'm so grateful that I'm home with my girls. I'm thankful they are home with me, instead of spending the day elsewhere. That I get to love on them, and not someone else. I remember how hard to was to let someone else mother them. Even though it means a sink full of dishes continuously, pee on the bathroom floor, and enough noise to wake the dead -I'm thankful it's my messy home they are at. And I'm thankful for the 80's station on XM radio. Because there is nothing like some BonJovi and Journey to make one 30ish person to feel young enough to keep up with 9 kids.

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Eye Nick... yesterday's adventure

So yesterday was a no school day. Something about grading day for elementary kids. So 8 kids here, and a little bit of a zoo going on. We made door hangers, we built a fort, we sat in timeout. In the afternoon, P decided to go visit a neighbor. She came home at 4:20pm saying she got a scratch on her eye. Sure enough there was a small red spot on her left eye.

Now, when she came in and told me she didn't say it hurt. She wasn't crying or upset. However, as soon as I mentioned I'd call the doctor- suddenly it hurt horribly and she was in tears. Sure enough, the triage nurse thought she should be seen if it was hurting.

Now it's 4:30pm, and an hour till my daycare kids are picked up. R can't be home any sooner to take her, and she is saying it hurts alot. Let the adventure begin....

She is crying and I've called R and told him I'm headed out to Urgent Care. I call my lovely neighbor/sub who has already spent the afternoon entertaining my oldest daughter and older daycare kid. They have a Wii and I can't compete with that. She thankfully is able to come and stay the last hour with the daycare so I can head out. As I'm getting ready, and a person we know from church calls and say that the State has removed their children from their home and can we take them as foster parents. All of this is about 5 minutes time. Add to that a parent picking up a child, and the normal 'she hit me' stuff that is always going on. It was CRAZY... and we still had to actually go to Urgent Care.

So P and I hop in the car and off we go to Woodburn to Urgent Care. Because Salem's Urgent Care always has at least an hour wait time. This Urgent Care is new, and so not as busy. Here's the best part- we were in, seen, and out of their in under 30 minutes time. 30 minutes in Urgent Care... I want to tell other people, and yet I want to keep the secret to myself. 30 minutes in Urgent Care!!

They put drops in her eyes that glow under black lights showing an injury. On the ride home, we have this conversation.

P "I'm going to go to the bathroom, turn out the lights and watch my eyes glow"

"That won't work, P. It's a black light, and that is what makes it glow"

P "Mom all dark is black, that's what happens when you turn out the lights. It's black."

"No, P. Black light is different, there are special bulbs you have to get."

P "Good thing we are going to Target, I bet we can get one there."

At this point I realize that I'm never going to win this one. It won't matter if the drops have worn off, or that is it really small and hard to see without a magnifying glass. Or that I'm not spending any more money that day. My battle plan is to hope she forgets by time we get to Target. Sure enough, she was distracted by shopping for Christmas dresses.

So the rest of the evening was spent getting a prescription filled, going to Taco Del Mar, and picking up an activity for another day of no school. It always amazing to me that the day can be rolling along, going just as planned, and in three seconds your headed in a completely different direction. Forget the quiet evening at home, now were headed to Urgent Care.

We are also waiting to hear if the Haiti government will be asking us to get a presidential pardon to adopt R and Er. While this is yet another time consuming step, we are holding off feeling anxiety about it until we know what is happening for sure. There are many bumps and detours in the path of adoption. Too many to panic every time one shows up. So no panic, but prayers that the Haiti government puts the welfare of the children first. Whatever that looks like.

Todays Adventure...Homemade Laundry Soap

Yep, I'm off to make homemade laundry soap. I must go to Goodwill first and pick up a soup pot that isn't cast-iron. I love my cast-iron to much to boil soap in it. Then I need to find a 5 gallon bucket with a lid, so probably a trip to Lowes or Home Depot. All of this to save money, hopefully it works. And I like the idea of being able to control what goes in it, without trying to decipher the label.


The other benefit... I can make it smell like jasmine. There is no jasmine smelling laundry soap, and I love jasmine. So, I'm off to try and make jasmine smelling homemade laundry soap. I'll let you all know how it goes. . . and if it's worth the effort. Although I'm thinking 6 months of laundry soap for $5 that smells like jasmine just might be worth quite alot of effort.

**UPDATE: Trip to Goodwill -successful. Found pot, found $5 supercute boots, and a stack of kids plates for $1. Kids were good, and hardly stressful. Trip to Home Depot - successful. Found bucket with lid, kids enjoyed car shopping cart and ride through parking lot.

Melted soap (as much as possible) in 'new' pan, and now my house smells like I've just spent 5 hours cleaning. But I haven't. I don't think I ever have. My house has never smelled this clean. I'll just boil some soap before company comes, and call it good from now on.

Put soap, water, washing soda and borax with 5 gallons water and now it sets overnight to 'thicken'. We will see... but if it doesn't work I still figured out how to make my house smell clean in about 5 minutes. That lesson alone was worth the effort.

**UPDATE: Soap gelled together well. I'm pretty impressed with myself. I'm off to fill my old laundry soap container, add essential oil to it, and run a load of laundry. I'm feeling very Little House of the Praire, although I think they collected ash to make soap with. So not exactly the same. But nevertheless, still feeling very self sufficent. I wonder if you can make homemade dishwasher detergent. Google search here I come...

Haiti...Why Haiti?

Well, that my friends is a loaded question. That simple answer...God sent us there. The rest of the story...

Haiti was brought to our attention before we were married. I knew of a family in Eastern Oregon that adopted a sibling group from Haiti, back when we were dating. It was big news, not only were they adopting, but from another country and their kids were black. BIG news, made the front page of the papers. We were drawn to this family, and even emailed them a few times with questions. And life happened, and we knew it wasn't the right time and we moved on.

Over the years, we always talked about adopting -and it was almost always about Haiti. During that time, we saw orphanages close down, the government deteriorate, and wondered if Haiti was even going to be an option when it came time. We decided if Haiti was closed when it was time, we'd look at other possibilities.

Last year, we were debt-free and praying about how and when to move forward. Our 'splurge' for becoming debt-free was to finally give up the rabbit ears and get cable. I know -we went crazy! The first week, I noticed a show called Adoption Stories. So I set the new fancy DVR to record it at 3:00 am. I sat down the first day to watch it, and it was about a family adopting from Haiti. An orphanage we had been looking at, and knew others that were adopting through. I thought that was interesting, entertaining, and I enjoyed it. I told R about it, and he just smiled and nodded.

I went on praying, and hoping for an answer soon. The waiting was making me nervous, was God going to say no after all of this time. Yet, no real direction or decision was right. The next week, there was another episode. I sat and cried the entire 30 minutes, even as I fast-forwarded through the commercials. It was the same orphanage, in Haiti. And I knew. As much as I knew I'd marry R as we drove that day to LaGrande. As much as I knew CN was a girl before our ultrasound, as much as I knew P would be our challenge from the first somersault in the womb. I just knew. I printed out the application that afternoon, and told R I knew. And I'd wait for him to know, as long as it took. I tucked the application away, and continued to pray for his heart to know.

Then 2 weeks later, on a weekend it happened. And it was undeniable. We had been at R's parents house, and he'd been out back kicking the ball around with his brother and nephew. On the car ride home he mentioned that would like a son to do those things with. He shared he was praying about it, and thinking hard. It was my turn to smile and nod. I knew the door was starting to open, and I needed to be patient and not push. As much as I truly wanted too...

We went home, and invited a friend over to watch the Adoption Stories I had on the DVR. There was a new one, and so we started with it. It also was the story of a family adopting from GLA in Haiti. We sat and watched, and as the father started to kick the soccer ball with his new son - I started to cry. I looked at R and it was obvious he noticed it to. Sometimes, God makes it obvious - and we felt it was obvious. We went to bed that night, and talked openly about it. We both knew it was to be Haiti, to be GLA, and a son. We knew R would kick the ball around, we knew we'd one day stand in that courtyard and meet our children for the first time. We knew this was in God's will for our lives, and felt secure in moving forward.

The next week I sent our application into GLA, and we were accepted. Even as we have watched other family wait for long periods for the process to move, and knowing there are other countries it is 'easier' to adopt from, we know Haiti is where God wants us. Even if it's harder, even if it means a longer wait, even if it doesn't make sense. And as soon as we looked at R and Er's eyes, we knew why. Haiti is where they are at. GLA is the orphanage they'd be taken to. God has been guiding us there, knowing our children would be there. He was getting us ready for them. As their paths were leading to us. And that is why Haiti...

And folks, that is the rest of the story... (I grew up listening to Paul Harvey)

Adoption Process... in a nutshell.

Once the decision to adopt was made, it started the ball being slowly pushed up a large mountain. A mountain of paperwork, government agencies, and prayer. The bigger the mountain, the more we see God's glory. I wanted to give a timeline, and as we update it will be easier to see our process.

1. Orphanage Application -we applied and were approved by by GLA in the spring of 2007.
2. Homestudy - we completed our homestudy in the fall of 2007.
3. I-600A - USCIS approval to adopt 2 children and bring them to the U.S.A. We were approved in the spring of 2008.
4. Dossier -quick definition -Dossier is the 5lbs of paperwork that is our life in writing that the Haiti government uses to determine if we are fit parents. Our dossier took about 6 months to put together, and was mailed the end of June.
5. Proposal -We recieved our proposal in September of 2008.
6. IBESR- Haiti's social services that must approve the adoption. We are currently waiting to enter this step.
7. Parquet- Haiti's court system. The official government approval.
8. Orphan Investigation- This is a requirement by the US government to determine the children meet thier definition of an orphan, and includes a birth parent interview.
9. Ministry of Interior - I'm not exactly sure what the MOI does, but it's important too...
10. VISA's - Important too. . . and so far off right now I don't spend alot of time thinking about.
11. Home !!!! I spend too much time thinking about probably.

This is a simple breakdown, and there is no set time we will be in any set step. However, we know God is in control, and his timing has been perfect all along. All the times I fretted about the time it was taking me to get our dossier ready- it got there with-in days of our children's arrival. God's perfect timing! All the times we wanted to move forward and couldn't - it's because our children weren't born yet...God's perfect timing. And as the days march on, and I want to hurry it up... I want to remember his perfect timing all along. Feel free to remind me when I forget!