Friday, May 22, 2009

We are going to Haiti

GOOD NEWS ... we are leaving June 15th to visit Re an Er and do paperwork in Haiti. While we won't be bringing them home this trip, we are overjoyed to visit.
I have lots of thoughts on it, and am still processing them. I'll spill them at some point, I'm sure. In the meanwhile, here is what is also going on.
-C returned from Outdoor school. P and her took a whole 10 minutes together to have a fight. Then they were grounded for the day. Then they both went into meltdown. Oh, and I was on the phone with a nice lady from the bank. The bank we are asking for a loan from. A loan to adopt. I think she wonders if that is a good idea.
-It's sunny today and should be during this three day weekend. That I foolishly grounded my kids for. What was I thinking?? I should have sent them out to pull weeds instead.
-Russ and I had a great 'marriage retreat' last weekend. We have homework to do. TNT- Two Nice Things (with no expectations ) and another 'talking' assignment. I've done one nice thing-took him a coffee to work, and plan on giving a foot massage tonight. I'm not sure what R has done. Unless he considers telling me he is naked under this clothes is suppose to count. Which it doesn't - because of the 'no expectations' clause to the assignment.

I swear I'll write more about the upcoming trip. What we can expect, what we will do while we are there, and why the trip is worth it.

Monday, May 18, 2009

Exciting News!!

Last Week we recieved news that our file has been approved by IBESR. That is Haiti's 'social services' department. We were overjoyed, and to honest, very surprised. We hadn't even considered it a possibility to have it exit IBESR before the summer. It's all about low expectations. So we are onto Parquet. While the orpahange said it could take 2-9 months, we're planning on the 9 months. And praying to be shocked one day to get an email before next Feb that it's moved on.

The other exciting news...I woke up with a burr in my bonnet to get somethings done around the house I've been neglecting. Like cleaning the fridge. And shredding the piles of papers I've got hanging around. And cleaning the fridge, because it's now beyond gross. I'm a little scared of what I might find.

I also am going to be making some calls today that will help me to set my summer schedule. I've been really feeling God asking me to stop being in a one-sided relationship with him. All take, no give. All about what I care about, only a little of what he cares about. Time spent when it's time for 'church'. Church being a social event. So many thoughts on this I don't even know how to articulate.
But I know he wants me to care about what he cares about. The sick, the poor, the needy, and be prepared to get messy about it. Not just write a check. Not just pray about it. Not just think about it. So I'm going to be making calls to see how where I can be used. And I truly believe I will spend more time with God there, than I have anywhere else.
I also feel drawn to schedule time with God. Not just 15 minutes of 'bible study' and not making sure we make all the church events. But a day with him. Walking with him, talking, reading, just being with him. The relationship (besides God) that is most important to me is R. And I schedule time for us to be alone. To talk, to walk, to just be in each other presence without distraction. And it has occurred to me that this is a very necessary thing to do with my relationship God. It feels funny to 'pencil' God into the calendar. Okay, I'll write it in pen. He's God, he's always with me, and yet I find that if I don't actually create a space in the calendar it's too easy to have the days fly by and feel like I haven't had time to really connect with him.
It has come down to a point where if it can't be bigger than just doing the church, bible study, and giving thing, then I can't do it anymore. Because I know he wants more than that. He wants us to LOVE being with him, and just him. He wants us to LOVE him enough to meet those who he loves even if they aren't who we love. And I deeply desire more than that. One a soul level, that desires nothing more than to be the beautiful woman God created.

So exciting things are happening around here. God is really challenging me, really asking me to walk away from my comfort zone- and not look back. And it's the most exciting place to be. On a soul level, to know you are working to be the person you are created to be. Knowing you are are going to meet your Creator in a whole new way, and get to know him in a completely different way than ever before.

Monday, May 11, 2009

Motherhood

Ten things I just love about being a Mom...
1. Holding my kids, smelling their hair, and snuggling
2. Hearing about their world, through their own unique perception
3. Watching them discover how to be kind, loving, and compassionate and how good it can feel
4. Seeing my husband as a father through their eyes
5. The lessons in grace, forgiveness, and love that come as I try to figure out this parenting gig
6. The sound of them coming through the door after school
7. Hearing them laugh, giggle, snort and come unglued by something funny
8. Learning to play and have fun all over again
9. Watching them discover God, how much he loves them, how much he adores them, and how to love him back
10. The unconditional love they have for me, and our family

Ten things I just looove (insert sarcasm) about Motherhood
1. Skid marked underwear in the laundry
2. Homework woes - Sunday night bedtime declarations of homework yet undone
3. Pee on the bathroom floor
4. Meltdowns over small details
5. Moping because they didn't get what they think they 'neeeeed'
6. The judgement we as mothers are so quick to dish out to each other
7. Endless laundry
8. The arguments from disagreements over parenting differences
9. Endless laundry (I really loooove doing laundry)
10. The truth that it will end someday, and while I'll always be a mom -they won't always need me.